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retrogrrrl) wrote2025-10-18 09:58 pm
retrogrrrl) wrote2025-10-18 09:58 pm
Entry tags:
Doctor Robot trying to be more human, apparently!
The road to being a more amicable person is, well, filled with strange attempts!
Lemme paint the panorama for ya! I was gettin’ my steps in through the park, just jammin’ to some tunes, right? I see that right ahead of me there’s a small group of teen girls, no older than twelve for sure. They were playin’ and shit, and one of them took a tumble and seemingly scraped her knee as she fell down to the ground, real gnarly shit. So naturally I’m like “Oof, alright, let’s see if I can help” ‘cause god knows that I’ve scraped my knee once or twice in that goddamn park myself. Believe me, the wound is never the thing but rather the wounded ego.
I saw ‘em struggling with helpin’ the girl up so I figured they needed an extra hand to lift the girl up and get her to a seat, y’dig? I was ready to scope out if she’ll be alright or if she needed, like, a first aid kid and that pink thingy they poured on me knees when mine were scraped. But by the time I get there, they finally help the girl up! But ‘cause I see the girl still in pain and strugglin’ a bit to stay up, I do the sensible thing and just go:
“Yo, y’all need a hand?”
And they all look at me in total, brutal silence. Not annoyed, not in a mean way, but rather like a deer caught in the headlights way. I lock eyes with one of ‘em and the chick seems petrified for a second. To ‘er credit, the poor thing is lookin’ at a woman with a sweet tender voice that looks like a fuckin’ hoodlum and probably smells like mosquito and a slight bit of Rexona-sponsored-sweat after a dancin’ sesh. I’m pretty odd and certainly the oddest fuckin’ thing these girls have ever seen in their short lives — or at least judgin’ by the wide-eyed stare I got in that brief moment before she shook her head rapidly and yelped a little “N-no! Thank you.”
To which I just gave a smile, a thumbs up and returned back to my walk. Cool and calm, like I had everythin’ under control and trusted they did too, but deep down inside I was fuckin’ sad that they seemed so flabbergasted by me LMAO. Y’gotta understand me here, I feel like I scared ‘em too hard here, unintentionally, and while I find some enjoyment in gettin’ some nasty stares from snobs I fear the girls might’ave been too scared to accept help if they DID need it. The only solace is that by the time I turned to observe, they were already seated by a nearby bench and fairin’ just fine so maybe they truly didn’t need my help.
But the thing is this, cats. I ain’t a real good neighbor, and I’ve been slowly learnin’ how to just look and be more amicable to people who I – ‘cause of bullies and shit – automatically assume might just deeply despise me. Y’know, startin’ with the small stuff like helpin’ people who might need it, greetin’ people when I walk past ‘em and grabbing the occasional stray ball that rolls my way instead of bein’ a goblin and letting it sit in its spot like I’m above everyone. Totally bogus, dude, that’s who I’ve been subconsciously for a long time and I wanta make a change.
Even if the change puts me face to face with people who will often time find me more scary than useful.
I’ll manage though, I always do.
Lemme paint the panorama for ya! I was gettin’ my steps in through the park, just jammin’ to some tunes, right? I see that right ahead of me there’s a small group of teen girls, no older than twelve for sure. They were playin’ and shit, and one of them took a tumble and seemingly scraped her knee as she fell down to the ground, real gnarly shit. So naturally I’m like “Oof, alright, let’s see if I can help” ‘cause god knows that I’ve scraped my knee once or twice in that goddamn park myself. Believe me, the wound is never the thing but rather the wounded ego.
I saw ‘em struggling with helpin’ the girl up so I figured they needed an extra hand to lift the girl up and get her to a seat, y’dig? I was ready to scope out if she’ll be alright or if she needed, like, a first aid kid and that pink thingy they poured on me knees when mine were scraped. But by the time I get there, they finally help the girl up! But ‘cause I see the girl still in pain and strugglin’ a bit to stay up, I do the sensible thing and just go:
“Yo, y’all need a hand?”
And they all look at me in total, brutal silence. Not annoyed, not in a mean way, but rather like a deer caught in the headlights way. I lock eyes with one of ‘em and the chick seems petrified for a second. To ‘er credit, the poor thing is lookin’ at a woman with a sweet tender voice that looks like a fuckin’ hoodlum and probably smells like mosquito and a slight bit of Rexona-sponsored-sweat after a dancin’ sesh. I’m pretty odd and certainly the oddest fuckin’ thing these girls have ever seen in their short lives — or at least judgin’ by the wide-eyed stare I got in that brief moment before she shook her head rapidly and yelped a little “N-no! Thank you.”
To which I just gave a smile, a thumbs up and returned back to my walk. Cool and calm, like I had everythin’ under control and trusted they did too, but deep down inside I was fuckin’ sad that they seemed so flabbergasted by me LMAO. Y’gotta understand me here, I feel like I scared ‘em too hard here, unintentionally, and while I find some enjoyment in gettin’ some nasty stares from snobs I fear the girls might’ave been too scared to accept help if they DID need it. The only solace is that by the time I turned to observe, they were already seated by a nearby bench and fairin’ just fine so maybe they truly didn’t need my help.
But the thing is this, cats. I ain’t a real good neighbor, and I’ve been slowly learnin’ how to just look and be more amicable to people who I – ‘cause of bullies and shit – automatically assume might just deeply despise me. Y’know, startin’ with the small stuff like helpin’ people who might need it, greetin’ people when I walk past ‘em and grabbing the occasional stray ball that rolls my way instead of bein’ a goblin and letting it sit in its spot like I’m above everyone. Totally bogus, dude, that’s who I’ve been subconsciously for a long time and I wanta make a change.
Even if the change puts me face to face with people who will often time find me more scary than useful.
I’ll manage though, I always do.